Monday, 14 December 2015

IF YOU'RE NOT HAPPY, HERE'S WHY!

How to create HAPPINESS... STEP by STEP guide! 

Here is the story by Tony Robbin:

As I write these words, I'm looking out over the deep blue Pacific from my room at the Hyatt Regency Waikoloa resort on the Big Island of Hawaii. I've just observed something that won't happen in North America again until the year 2017: a total eclipse of the sun. Becky and I got up this morning at 5:30 a.m. so that we, along with thousands of other visitors, could witness this rare astronomical event.
As crowds of people gathered at the viewing site, I began to entertain myself by watching the diversity of people who had come to share this occasion: everyone from top businessmen to vacationing families, from scientists lugging dozens of telescopes to hikers who'd pitched their tents in the lava pits overnight, and little children who knew this was an exciting event only because their parents had told them so. Here were hordes of people who had flown in from all over the world, at a cost of thousands of dollars, just for the chance to see something that would take about four minutes! What were we doing here? We wanted to stand in a shadow! We're an interesting species, aren't we?


By 6:28 a.m., the drama had begun to unfold. There was anxiety in the air, not just the anticipation of seeing the eclipse, but the fear of disappointment. For on this unique morning, the clouds had begun to gather, and the sky was becoming overcast. It was interesting to see how people were dealing with the possibility that their expectations would not be met. What they had come to see was not merely a brief flitting139 of the moon over the sun, but a four-minute total eclipse—when the shadow of
the moon would completely block the sun's rays and envelop us in darkness. They even had a name for it: totality!

By 7:10 a.m., the clouds had increased and were getting larger by the minute. Suddenly, the sun broke through a hole in the clouds, and for a moment we could all see a partial eclipse. The crowd greeted it with excited applause, but soon the clouds rolled back in, thicker and thicker, completely obscuring our view. Nearing the moment of totality—utter darkness—it became obvious that we wouldn't be able to watch the moon overtake the sun.

Suddenly, thousands of people began to run over to a big-screen television set that one of the many TV crews had erected. There we sat, watching the eclipse on national television, just like everyone else in the world! In those moments I had a chance to observe an unlimited range of human emotion. Each person responded according to their rules: their beliefs about what had to happen in order for them to feel good about this experience.
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One man behind me started cursing, saying, "I spent $4,000 and traveled all this way, just so I could watch this for four minutes on television?" A woman only a few feet away kept saying, "I can't believe we missed it!" while her bright little daughter enthusiastically reminded her, "But, Mom, it's happening right now!" Another woman sitting just to my right said, "Isn't this incredible? I feel so lucky to be here!"
Then a dramatic thing happened. As we observed on TV the last sliver of sunlight disappear behind the moon, in that instant we were engulfed in darkness. It was completely unlike nightfall, when the sky darkens gradually. This was immediate and total darkness! Initially there was a roar through the crowd, but then a hush140 fell upon us. The birds flew into the trees and became silent. It was a truly amazing moment. Then something hysterical happened. As people sat in the dark, staring at the eclipse on the television screen, some of those who had brought their cameras and were determined to get their outcome began taking pictures of the screen. In a moment, we were flooded with light again—not because of the sun—but because of all the flash bulbs!

Almost as soon as it had begun, though, totality was over. The most dramatic moment of the whole event for me was the instant that a thin sliver of the sun slipped out from behind the moon, instantly bringing full daylight with it. It occurred to me then that it doesn't take very much light to wipe out the darkness.
Within moments of the return of sunlight, a large number of people got up and began to leave. I was puzzled. After all, the eclipse was still happening. Most of them were muttering141 complaints about how they'd "come all this way and missed out on the experience of a lifetime." A few enraptured142 souls, however, lingered143 to watch every minute, feeling great excitement and joy. The most ironic thing of all was that within fifteen to twenty minutes, the trade winds had cleared all the clouds from the sky.
It was now blue and clear, and the eclipse was revealed144 for everyone to see. But few people had remained; most had already returned to their rooms disgruntled. They continued to give themselves the sensations of pain because their expectations had not been met.

As I usually do, I started interviewing people. I wanted to find out what their experience of the eclipse had been. Many people talked about how it was the most incredible, spiritual experience of their lives. One pregnant woman rubbed her swollen tummy and shared with me that the eclipse somehow had created a feeling of stronger connection with her unborn child, and that this was just the right place on earth for her to be. What a contrast of beliefs and rules I noticed today!


What struck me as most humorous, though, was that people would get so excited and emotional about something like this, which was merely a four-minute shadow. If you really think about it, it's no more of a miracle than the sun coming up each morning! Can you imagine if every morning people from all over the world got up early so they could watch the sun come up? What it national and international news ardently covered every phase of the event with in-depth reports, passionately tracking the sun's rise into the sky, and everybody spent their mornings talking about what a miracle it is? Can you imagine the kind of days we'd have? What if CNN opened every broadcast with, "Good morning. Once again, the miracle has happened—the sun has risen!"? Why don't we respond this way? Could we? You bet we could. But the problem is that we've become habituated. We're so accustomed to the miracles happening around us every day that we don't even see them as miracles anymore.

For most of us, our rules for what's valuable dictate that we covet things that are scarce, instead of appreciating the miracles that abound. What determined the differences in these people's responses, from one man who got so upset he destroyed his camera on the spot, to those who not only experienced joy today, but would experience it every time they told others about the eclipse in the coming weeks, months, and years?

Our experience of this reality had nothing to do with reality, but was interpreted through the
controlling force of our beliefs: specifically, the rules we had about what had to happen in order for us to feel good. I call these specific beliefs that determine when we get pain and when we get pleasure rules. Failure to understand their power can destroy any possibility for lifelong happiness, and a full understanding and utilization of them can transform your life as much as anything we've covered in
this entire book.


Let met ask you a question before we go any further. What has to happen in order for you to feel good? 


Do you have to have someone hug you, kiss you, make love to you, tell you how much they respect
and appreciate you? Must you make a million dollars? Do you have to hit below-par golf? Do you have to be acknowledged by your boss? Do you have to achieve all of your goals? Do you have to drive the right car, go to the right parties, be known by the right people? Do you have to be spiritually evolved
or wait until you achieve total enlightenment? Do you have to run five miles a day? What really has to happen in order for you to feel good?


The truth is that nothing has to happen in order for you to feel good. You don't need an eclipse to feel good. You could feel good right now for absolutely no reason whatsoever! Think about it. If you make a million dollars, the million dollars doesn't give you any pleasure. It's your rule that says, "When I hit this mark, then I'll give myself permission to feel good." In that moment, when you decide to feel good, you send a message to your brain to change your responses in the muscles of your face, chest, and body, to change your breathing, and to change the biochemistry within your nervous system that causes you to feel the sensations you call pleasure.


Who do you think had the worst time the day of the eclipse? Those with the most intense rules about what had to happen before they could feel good! There's no doubt that the scientists, and the tourists who saw themselves as scientists, probably had the most pain. Many of them had huge agendas they were trying to complete in those four minutes before they could feel good about it.


Don't misunderstand; there's nothing wrong with being committed to accomplishing and doing everything you can. But years ago, I made a distinction that changed the quality of my life forever: as long as we structure our lives in a way where our happiness is dependent upon something we cannot control, then we will experience pain. Since I wasn't willing to live with the fear that pain could shake me anymore, and I considered myself to be intelligent, I redesigned my rules so that when I feel pain and when I feel pleasure is whenever I feel it's appropriate based on my capacity to direct my own mind, body, and emotions. Specifically, Becky and I enjoyed the eclipse immensely.

But the real reason we enjoyed ourselves was not that we had low expectations; we were looking forward to it. The key to our happiness could be found in one key rule we shared: we decided that our rule for the day was that we were going to enjoy this event no matter what happened. It wasn't that we didn't have expectations; it was that we decided that no matter what happened, we'd find a way to enjoy it.

Now, if you adopted and consistently applied this rule to your own life, can you see how that would change virtually everything you experience? When I tell people about this rule, some of them respond, "Yeah, but you're just lowering your standards." Nothing could be further from the truth! To adopt this rule is to raise your standards. It means you'll hold yourself to a higher standard of enjoying yourself despite the conditions of the moment. It means you've committed to being intelligent enough, flexible enough, and creative enough to direct your focus and evaluations in a way that allows you to experience the true richness of life—maybe that's the ultimate rule. 



Thursday, 22 October 2015

I am in this week's Picfair Picks!‏-- No. 11 in the "PAUSE"

After first prize in Panoramio website for my Langkawi Photo, which got me a new digital camera.

Panoramio February 2011 photo contest. First prize in Travel category. Please click here for the link 






This is the second one that excited me! I am in this week's Picfair Picks, the "PAUSE". wow! Never thought my photos will get another recognition like this! I am so so so EXCITED!

WOW! Picfair Picks 2015, The "PAUSE"--- Please click here for the link 




More to come ! definitely More to come!!!
Please come and support me!! yeah!

In life, never spend more than 10 percent of your time on the problem, and spend at least 90 percent of your time on the solution. Most important, don’t sweat the small stuff. . . and remember, it’s all small stuff

Remember, our goal is not to ignore the problems of life, but to put ourselves in better mental and emotional states where we can not only come up with solutions, but act upon them.

Then, anything... I mean anything will become possible! As long as you focus, decide and TAKE ACTION! A LOT A LOT Of action!!!! 

Just like this photo! IT is possible!!! 
Thanks again for the support!





Sunday, 11 October 2015

How to communicate? Even in Anger, Frustration... Still get the result Desired!!!



Leh: Just love the tone of the ray shining on the Himalayan range.



The Talking Stick That Do the MAGIC!!!

The talking stick has been used for centuries by many American Indian tribes as a means of just and impartial hearing. The talking stick was commonly used in council circles to designate who had the right to speak. When matters of great concern came before the council, the leading elder would hold the talking stick and begin the discussion. When he finished what he had to say he would hold out the talking stick, and whoever wished to speak after him would take it. In this manner the stick was passed from one individual to another until all who wished to speak had done so. The stick was then passed back to the leading elder for safe keeping.

I found it very POWERFUL tool when I encounter similar problem in my conversation with my loves one. They seemed not to understand what I trying very very hard to CONVEY... It ended up with MORE and MORE frustration until I discovered this wonderful talking tool!

USE THE TALKING STICK!!! ( just use anything as a symbol , e.g. Pen... )

Whoever holds the talking stick has within his hands the sacred power of words. Only he can speak while he holds the stick; the other council members must remain silent. The eagle feather tied to the talking stick gives him the courage and wisdom to speak truthfully and wisely. The rabbit fur on the end of the stick reminds him that his words must come from his heart and that they must be soft and warm. The blue stone will remind him that the Great Spirit hears the message of his heart as well as the words he speaks. The shell, iridescent and ever changing, reminds him that all creation changes -- the days, the seasons, the years -- and people and situations change, too. The four colors of beads -- yellow for the sunrise (east), red for the sunset (west), white for the snow (north) and green for the earth (south) -- are symbolic of the powers of the universe he has in his hands at the moment to speak what is in his heart. Attached to the stick are strands of hair from the great buffalo. He who speaks may do so with the power and strength of this great animal.

The speaker should not forget that he carries within himself a sacred spark of the Great Spirit, and therefore he is also sacred. If he feels he cannot honor the talking stick with his words, he should refrain from speaking so he will not dishonor himself. When he is again in control of his words, the stick will be returned to him.


Stephen Covey on " The Indian Talking Stick" 

** at time, you may face frustration, anger when you talk to other people especially your love one... more so if they don't understand your message... NOW, I FOUND a solution for that ... even when the communication in anger... you can change it to most FRUITFUL communication! I did it myself, it works on me. I hope this help you too!!! 


Stephen Covey explains the power of listening for understanding in his story about the Indian Talking Stick.  As anyone knows who has ever taken one of my college classes or attended one of my business seminars, I believe that listening is one of the most under utilized and underrated skills of leaders and managers.  
In our culture of just get it done, business leaders and managers often do not listen to each other to truly understand the other point of view.  When leaders and managers really learn to listen to understand the perspectives of their employees, customers, and other important stakeholders, they not only improve interpersonal relationships but they also get better results (often simply because they have better information on which to act).  
Native Americans understood the power of empathetic listening  as Stephen discusses in the following video:

This is the way to go!
Ultimate way of communication!
The Indian Talking Stick! 



Saturday, 3 October 2015

One of the world most Dangerous Road

There’s nothing like a road trip to lift the spirits – beautiful views, restful days, discovering new places. But maybe you’re the sort of strange cookie who finds that a tad boring. You prefer your panoramic views with a few spoons of hair-raising adrenalin.
What makes a road an adventure? Narrow gravel tracks perched precipitously on mountainsides certainly up the ante. As do roads so far away from civilization that taking survival supplies is mandatory. Then there are routes that you must time right, or you’ll wish you’d taken a boat instead.

Travelling via Toyota Innova from Leh to Nubra Valley

Scenic view with flora and fauna Along the Journey

Long winding road...
As narrow as you can imagine...

full with rocks , cliffs... 
turns...
Dangers! 

Possible of rock and landslides...
even Mudslides...

Roads might covered with AIS during winter.

Long Winding Road with sharp Curves...

Of course :
full of scenic mountain view! 





Riding a motorcycle on this road can be challenging...
and LIFE THREATENING! 













This was the ROAD that I travel...
one of the most Dangerous Road in the WORLD! 


The Leh-Manali Highway is a high mountain road situated in India. It spans over a length of 479 km (298 mi) among the Himalaya mountain range. It passes through some of the worlds highest mountain passes in the world, with a mean altitude in between 2 to 3 miles above sea level. Uncertain weather, high altitude, no roads, extreme cold and no civilization for miles make this a very treacherous track. Carry extra fuel and feel close to heaven.

This dirt gravel road connects Leh in Ladakh in Jammu and Kashmir state and Manali in Himachal Pradesh state. It crosses some of worlds highest passes including averaging well over 17,000 feet. The journey from Manali to Leh takes about one full day by jeep or two days by bus. It’s accessible for cars and trucks during several months in summer only and ts highest elevation is 5,328 m (17,480 ft) at Taglang La mountain pass. Because of the important position of Ladakh between China and Pakistan this Highway plays an important strategic role for India, which results in the maintenance of the road by the Indian army itself. In addition to the spectacular landscape the life on and next to the road is diversified because of a wide variety of people frequenting it. Construction workers from other parts of India are working for better road conditions during the summer.

This road is usually is open for only about four and a half months in a year in summer between May or June, when the snow is cleared by the Border Roads Organisation of Indian army, and mid-October when snowfall again blocks it. Avalanches and heavy snowfalls can sometimes block some sections of the road and can be extremely dangerous due to frequent patches of ice. Conditions can change quickly and be harsh. Road closures can be frequent, so check conditions before traveling to this area. Tourists from all over the world, as well as a growing number of Indian tourists use this road for the scenic impressions of the mountains. Truck drivers transport their cargo to Leh and back to other parts of India.

The trip on this road includes a lot of dangers. The road itself, with trucks and buses that sometimes travel only at 15 to 20 km/h due to the road condition. This is not the most comfortable drive in the world. This is not helped by the fact that some of the roads have drops to the side of a good few hundred metres. You can observe crashed and unlucky vehicles cover with rust down the slope somewhere...  And some of the passes are really spectacular, especially if you have to wait on the side of the road for a truck to pass... The road is one of the most complicated and challenging roads in the world, with snow, never ending traffic jams, landslides and terrain making the journey exceedingly difficult for anything other than a capable four wheel drive vehicle.


Due its climb in elevation over thousands of feet, and pass through remote areas, it is important when driving in these conditions to be prepared. Owing to the rarefied atmosphere (low air pressure) at high altitude, less oxygen is breathed in and many travellers experience altitude sickness or acute mountain sickness, causing acute mountain sickness: headache, nausea, dizziness and vomiting. Ladakh is a cold semi-arid desert. It is cold along the highway even in summer (June onwards); the days are warm in bright sunshine but the nights are very cold. Check weather forecasts before leaving home, and remember that it becomes cooler and often more prone to storms at higher elevations.
 
Watch out for sudden loose-gravel breaks. And that pavement can ripple like a roller coaster track in places where “frost heaves” are caused by seasonal freezing and thawing of the ground. It’s incredible what kind of vehicles are using the road - from tankers and goods lorrys, army trucks to whatever else comes along with a motor in it, or without the motor, as some cyclist do. The surface on this gravel road is often loose, especially along the sides of the road. It makes necessary to drive carefully and slow down whenever approaching an oncoming car.The road, built and maintained by the Indian Army, plays an important role in the movement of armed forces in Ladakh. It's cleared by the Border Roads Organisation (BRO).

Proper preparation is essential to having a safe, enjoyable trop on this road. Due to the remoteness of the area, take special care to ensure that your vehicle is ready for the trip: inspect all tires and make sure they are properly inflated, check all vehicle fluids, replace worn hoses and belts, empty your RV's holding tank and fill the water tank, purchase groceries and supplies. For the vehicle, bring at least two full-sized spare tires mounted on rims, tire jack and tools for flat tires, emergency flares, extra gasoline, motor oil, and wiper fluid and a radio. It is also advisable to carry chocolates, glucose or other high energy food on the journey and spend only a little time at the high mountain passes. 

Next project: Neonate photography

Hm...
This looks really sweet!
Anyone interested to try this ? Please let me know.






Baby Shooting Videography


Wednesday, 30 September 2015

"A letter to My Daughter" - A letter to remind myself....


a good article shared from:
Click here for the original article


To My Daughter,
You broke my heart today. You didn't realise. We were playing together, sat on the floor with your little sister, you holding one of your Elsa dolls. You turned to me and said "Mummy, when I grow up I want to be a doctor". I asked you why, and you said "So I could go to work with you Mummy, then I would see you more". That was the moment. 
Being a parent is the hardest thing I have ever done, and it's the best thing I have ever done. Your daddy and I both work hard so we can try and give you and your sister everything. I love you both beyond anything else in this world, and part of being a mummy is to be there for you no matter what. But my darling girl, please don't be a doctor. 
You say this as you play, and imagine yourself making your Elsa doll better from some imagined illness. You forget that you cried when I left for work last week. You forget that Mummy couldn't pick you up after school for two weeks in a row because I didn't finish work on time. You forget that I missed bedtime every night this week, and that I left the house before you woke up this morning. I didn't even steal in to give you a goodbye kiss, or to watch you sleeping. I worried I would wake you, and part of being a mummy is trying to do what is right, not what I want all the time. 
When I have a day off, I watch you playing with your daddy and my heart fills you love for you both. But part of me is sad. All those missed bedtimes and school runs, you and Daddy got to spend time together, and I can see how that has made you adore him even more than you did before. That is what I want. I want you to have that relationship with him. But I can't help the ache in my heart that when you fell over, you ran to him, not me. 
I spend my days trying to help people at work. I try to make them better, and that is a wonderful job to have. But when Mummy is late again because she is helping poorly people, it means I'm not there to help you. Part of being a doctor is putting other people first, but sometimes Mummy gets that wrong. It's very hard to say no when you can help someone, but that means Mummy missed your assembly again. It means I don't get to take you to your friends birthday parties at the weekend. It means sometimes Mummy feels tired and sometimes I get grumpy with you. That isn't fair. 
You asked why Daddy was cross last week - he was cross with Mummy. He was cross because he loves me, and once again Mummy hadn't had time to eat anything or have a drink that day. Work was too busy - too many poorly people. When Mummy comes home at the end of a busy day like that, I feel poorly and tired. Then I don't feel like playing with you and that makes me sad. 
I'm so sorry my darling girl, but Mummy isn't sure she can be a doctor anymore. Now the people in charge want Mummy to work harder and longer than I do already. I don't know how I can do that and still be there for you. I don't want to miss you grow up, and I don't wish for you the heartache and choices that I have had to make. Being a doctor used to be the best job in the world. And I knew when I went to work, I was making a big difference to all the poorly people. That made me feel that although I was missing you, it was worth it and I was really lucky. I never needed to worry I might not have a job like some mummies do. Being a doctor means I never needed to worry we couldn't buy the clothes and food you need, like some other mummies do. 
But now, it's not the best job anymore. It's really hard and sometimes it makes Mummy cry. Now I go to work and all I do is wish I wasn't there. When I have you and your sister to miss, when the news on the radio says Mummy isn't working hard enough, when the poorly person I see says I earn too much, when they shout and swear at me, then suddenly it doesn't seem worth being away from you for that. 
Someday, a long time from now, you might be a Mummy too. When you are, you will understand better. But for now, let's say you'll think about being a doctor, and maybe we can find another job that means you won't have to feel the way I do right now. 
All my love,
Mummy xxx
This is a letter for the NHS - written by me, as a Doctor, to my daughter. I have written this thinking of all the Junior Doctors facing huge uncertainty at the moment. There are parents, children, patients, doctors, nurses, and many other staff who are all a part of the NHS. If you want to share your experience, please write a Letter for the NHS. Share on "Letters for the NHS" on Facebook, or @Letters4NHSand #Letters4NHS on twitter. Behind the politics and the policies, are people. Sometimes that gets forgotten.




Saturday, 26 September 2015

Julley!













Julley (जुले ) is not just a word. It’s a magical word. Not a single word, it's a complete sentence, or a story. And sometime, it is more than a sentence. Julley is a mesmerizing word that gets your work done anywhere in Ladakh. It brings you respect, helps you find way, gets you tasty food, brings you closer to local people, makes new Ladakhi friends, gets you helping hands and many more.

Julley (or Joolay) is a common word in Ladakh (and tribal areas of Himachal including Lahaul-Spiti, Kinnaur and parts of Kullu) which means Namaste, hello, hi. Meaning of Julley has changed over the time. Now some people use Julley to bid good bye also. The local people, mostly Buddhists, of Ladakh and Himachal wish each other with words like Julley and Tashi Delek (or Tashi Dile). The Julley word has grown so famous among the military people in Ladakh that they also have started to wish people by saying Julley every time they start conversation. If somebody says you Julley, just reply: “Julley” with smile on face and a little hunched shoulders to express your respect to the person.

Julley has now also become famous among the outsiders. It all started with tourism boom in Ladakh and local people here started wishing travellers with Julley. Now, whenever you visit Ladakh, you will hear Julley a lot of times a day. Julley refers to respect. If you want to start conversation with Ladakhi man or woman, just say Julley with smile on your face, and see the magic happening itself. The person will himself/herself show his/her interest in you, with faith and respect.
You are driving a jeep (or bike) and you have some technical problem. You want help. Just say Julley to occupants of that area and they will put all possible efforts to help you. You forgot your way back hotel, you don’t know from where to take diversion to Pangong Lake, you are searching for a dhaba, you are looking for a medical store, you want to know about the local culture of a village, your phone is not working and want local person to allow you to use his cellphone or want a lift in a car, Julley makes it possible for you. But remember; don’t feel like buttering, deceiving or getting your work done selfishly by riding on the shoulders of Julley. Julley is a respect. So earn it, spread it and make it your smile and your ornament. Respect local culture, respect Julley.
Julley!